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BATMAN & ROBIN

  • ️Jim Moon

Batman & Robin

There are bad films, terrible films and then there's Joel Schumacher's Batman & Robin. When the incomparable Black Dog Podcast covered this horror in a recent episode, it inspired record amounts of hate driven feedback, with the episode turning into a massive group therapy session where movie buffs and Bat-fans alike exorcised the psychic demons that this flick unleashed.

And from the shadowed halls of Hypnogoria Towers, came this...

Now after that torrent of audio bile, and in a vain attempt to reintroduce a bit of class and sanity, here's the original Adrian Henri poem that inspired it...

BATPOEM
(for Bob Kane and The Almost Blues)

Take me back to Gotham City
Batman
Take me where the girls are pretty
Batman

All those damsels in distress
Half-undressed or even less
The Batpill makes 'em all say Yes
Batman

Help us out in Vietnam
Batman
Help us drop that Batnapalm
Batman

Help us bomb those jungle towns
Spreading pain and death around
Coke 'n candy wins 'em round
Batman

Help us smash the Vietcong
Batman
Help us show them that they're wrong
Batman

Help us spread democracy
Get them high on LSD
Make them just like you and me
Batman

Show me what I have to do
Batman
'Cause I want to be like you
Batman

Flash your Batsign over Lime Street
Batmobiles down every crime street
Happy Batday that's when I'll meet
Batman

This and many other fine poems by Mr Henri, along with works by Roger McGough and Brian Patten, can be found in The Mersey Sound. First pulblished in 1967 by Penguin Books, this is a classic collection of British poems, reprinted countless times and still available in all good book stores and even alot of shite ones too.


JIM MOON, 11th July 2010


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