Reviews of The Hessen Affair

Yep, this is a Billy Zane movie.

The dude's not the worst actor in the world or anything but I can't figure out how he was in Titanic, one of the most popular films of all time, and managed to fall so far so quickly. He's been in some notoriously awful stuff and this is no exception, even if it was kind of ambitious for what was clearly a low-budget affair. It's an attempt to make a WW2 noir film…

One day there will be a visual arts exhibit of this entire film being projected on a wall on mute while ABBA is playing instead

It's an ambitious noir film, perhaps a bit low-budget, but quite nice. It's not too flashy, which is nice. Acting is not too bad, set design and props felt alright, and the tone is captured quite nicely. Some critics mocked the lighting but i think it was done really well.

do not ask me the color of anything

why did you make me watch this Lyne this was terrible but I still love you

Looks good and very glossy but it flatters to deceive.